Expressions of Hope - Blog for grieving parents by GPS Hope

July 22, 2015 by Laura Diehl 6 Comments

Seven Ways to Shift From Fear to Faith (Part 1)

Almost four years ago our oldest daughter left this earth. Having a child die brings many deep and intense emotions that cannot be described. Since that time I have connected with other parents who have also lost a child. One of the things this very unnatural and painful loss can cause is fear, on many levels.

We all go through trials and difficulties that can cause us to fight fear. I want to share with you a few things to help make a shift in how you see God in the midst of any fear caused by the pain of a tragedy, trauma, or severe difficulty in life.

1. Perspective can change everything.

It may not seem like it, but our perspective is a choice we make. You can choose to either hang on to a perspective that gives you lots of torment, or ask God to see your situation with a different set of eyes (hopefully His).I can either focus on my personal loss that my child is permanently absent from this earth, or I can focus on the fact that my child is absent from this earth but present with the Lord, and even though the pain is intense, I will meet up with my child again in our eternal home, never to be separated again.

2. Being able to take my needs and my fears to God in prayer makes a big difference in my life.

I think of Peter’s answer when Jesus asked His twelve followers, “Will you leave Me also?” Peter said, “Lord, who else can we go to? You have words that give life that lasts forever” (John 6:68 NLV). For many years I have said Jesus isn’t a crutch to me. He is my wheelchair. That is truer now than it has ever been.

It keeps me from feeling so helpless in a circumstance I have no control over. Praying gives me much more control over how I respond to my feelings and fears. It may be that the only thing I have control over is my communication with God, but that is actually enough.

3. Having the revelation that God always leads us into triumph makes a huge dent in our fears.

During a worship song at church one day, I suddenly realized that if I bring God into my battle (including the battle of my fears and my darkness) then I will win, because it is impossible for Him to lose! He is the Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end (Revelation 1:8). God has the first and last word in my life, and He also has it in the life of my child! God has never entered a battle where He came out as the loser, and He never will. As soon as I ask God to fight for me, I know somehow in the end I will come out victorious!

4. Reading the book of Psalms in the Bible can be extremely helpful.

Over and over the writer cries out for help from a very dark place of despair. And God responds by being a rock, a refuge and help in times of need. I spend a lot of time there when I “relapse” and find myself struggling with the pain and reality that Becca is gone and I won’t see her again until I join her in heaven.

5. Don’t keep looking back, allowing yourself to be paralyzed by the pain of the past, trying to stay in a place which no longer exists.

I am so sorry to say this, and I am not trying to be cruel, but simply want to set you free; no matter how much you want your life to go back to the way it was before your tragedy (such as my wanting my daughter’s life back) it isn’t going to happen.

When I did that, God reminded me of Lot’s wife. When she looked back to the tragedy she was leaving, she died immediately, being frozen (turned into a pillar of salt) to that place (Genesis 19:26). That is an extreme example, but continuing to look back, longing for the past that no longer exists will become a tormenting fear which will paralyze you from going forward. God told me not to keep looking back at my crushing blow, and if I continued to look back to ponder and relive the death of my daughter, I would not be able to walk in the power of His resurrection life.

The solution? Here is what I wrote in my journal as I heard God speak to me: Receive it! Just receive this new life I am giving you. You will grow stronger in it each day you come up to Me to drink. Drink daily. Drink deeply. For it will truly be a wellspring of life in you and through you. Cross over from death to life! Cross over from sorrow into joy! Cross over into new depths of My love and My will and My ways for your life.

Next week we will look at the last two ways to shift from fear to faith. In the meantime, what is something God is showing you His perspective on in your life that is giving you freedom from fear?

Note: This was adapted from Laura’s book When Tragedy Strikes which will be available in bookstores everywhere in July 2016. Click here for more information.

July 15, 2015 by Laura Diehl 2 Comments

Are You Pushing Someone You Need Out of the Way?

There are several studies and books that talk about personality types. One book refers to them as four different animals. Based on that book, I am a playful otter, and my husband is a loyal golden retriever. We had to laugh when we realized that must be one reason our marriage works so well; I like to have fun, and he likes to watch me have fun!

We both also have different giftings and strengths. God gave me the giftings of a leader and teacher, with an anointing to teach children. Dave has totally different giftings and callings, such as the gift to analyze situations and he has wisdom with finances. (I, on the other hand, am not very good at either of those things.)

I don’t want to push him out of the way so I can do the things he is good at and does well, nor does he want to push me out of the way to do the things I am good at and do well.

I am thinking of one area in particular where these differences could definitely be seen as we raised our kids. I almost always led our nightly family devotions when our children were young. I used to get very frustrated that Dave wouldn’t step in and take over. I saw it as a weakness in him, and I’d get upset (but I wouldn’t tell him about my frustration, I would just stew about it.)

Years later, after our children were grown, we had a discussion about it. After all those years, I finally realized he was allowing me to use my giftings in our home with our own children. He wasn’t being a husband pushing his wife out of the way just to be the “man of the house” based on what others thought a husband and father should do.

There are those who will say that means I was “wearing the pants in the family” and Dave was not being the head of the home. But that wasn’t the case. Our marriage has always been one of co-submission, and I have always allowed him to have the final word on decisions made in our home. (See my previous blog What I Have Learned About Submission After 31 Years of Marriage.)

How about you? Are there areas in your life you are weak in, where you pull others forward to take your place? Or do you insist on doing it yourself, while someone who could do it so much easier and better is forced to watch on the sidelines?

Don’t let what others might think of you keep you from being effective in what God has called you to do.

God’s plans for us are not “man-sized” plans; they are “God-sized” plans. That means you are going to need others to help you.

Insisting on doing something myself when there is someone in my life who can do it for me, and do it better than me, is called pride.

James 4:6 tells us “God resists the proud” (NKJV). Some translations say God opposes the proud. It goes on to say that He gives grace to the humble.

So I can either walk in pride, insisting on doing something that is not my area of gifting, and have God resist or oppose me,

I can humble myself, allowing someone else to be used in their gifting, and have God’s grace be a part of whatever it is I am doing.

So we get to choose whether we want God’s resistance or God’s grace. It seems a bit obvious when we look at it from God’s perspective, doesn’t it?

Is there a time when you stepped aside and let someone else’s gifting shine, and you saw God’s grace come in a sweet or powerful way? I would love to hear about it in the comment section below.

July 8, 2015 by Laura Diehl 2 Comments

From a Millennial – One Heart at a Time

There is so much being said about the recent Supreme Court decision about gay marriage. I was not going to jump in on all of it, until my middle son, who is part of the Millennial Generation, posted his thoughts on Facebook. I decided to share his words with you here.

I don’t normally post about these topics, but for some reason I feel compelled to. I’ve been seeing and hearing a lot of Christians upset and worried that God is going to remove his covering from us as a nation, now that gay marriage is legal. I want to say these two things:

1. God does not look on the outside (what our laws are as a nation). He looks at what is on the inside (our hearts, what we the people who make the nation desire). So, I do not believe fighting for the law to be re-established as marriage only being between a man and woman, is going to all of a sudden bring us back into favor as a nation with God.

Why do I say that? Because God is not about our laws. He is all about our hearts.

God won’t look at America and say “Oh, they will not allow these people to have a piece of paper that states the government will give them a tax break and certain benefits. I give them my blessing.”

Why not? Because He knows that those people in their hearts are still going to be “married” to each other with or without the government’s paper. We are so focused on the outward act (laws) that we are pushing any real chance of changing hearts and getting back God’s blessing.

If we allow Him to truly change our hearts, essentially, we will have no need for the laws.

Now, I admit I have not studied the scripture as intensely as a lot of other Christians out there; but, to this date in my readings of Christ walking the earth, and any of the apostles, I have not read anywhere telling us to make sure we are pushing for laws in our land to match our every belief. I have not read anywhere that Jesus tried to change a law of the land. He reached the people’s hearts.

2. I can’t help but wonder if some Christians are so worried about it because they realize their faith may actually be tested! We will have to actually walk out our faith and start relying on God for our refuge if we have tipped the scales and His judgement does come on our nation.

I think of verses like Psalm 91:1, “He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall remain stable and fixed under shadow of the Almighty.”

AMEN! Yeah, our country may not be under God’s covering, but you know what, I sure still am! Thank you God, that You stay faithful to us, even when we are in a country that is forsaking You! Thank You that You allow us to be in the world, not of it!

Psalm 91: 8-10, “A thousand shall fall at your side, and ten thousand at your right hand; but it shall not come near you. Only with your eyes shall you behold and see the reward of the wicked. Because you have made the Lord, which is my refuge, even the most High your habitation. There shall no evil befall you, nor any plague or calamity come near your tent.” (Yeah, we may be camping in the near future as Christians, lol.)

So, brothers and sisters, in closing, I say this. Please stop focusing so much towards what laws (the mere symptoms of sin) that are, or aren’t established in our country. If we have a chance to change a law by way of voting or something, by all means do so. But we need to stop the pushing back with mere words, saying how it is an abomination. That only hardens their hearts more. Trying so hard to change this as a law only forces the heart of the nation to remain hidden. Let’s start changing our country the way Jesus does/would. Let’s start loving and reaching the people, one heart at a time.

God bless. And if you got down here, thanks for taking the time to read; I hope it spoke to you.

July 3, 2015 by Laura Diehl Leave a Comment

Is Independence Always a Good Thing?

Do you like to celebrate birthdays? I sure do. The fourth of July is when we get to celebrate the birthday of our country, the United States of America. On that day many towns have carnivals, and it ends with fireworks. It is a day we celebrate becoming independent as a nation.

What does “independent” mean? It means we don’t depend on or need anyone for anything. And that spirit of independence can easily creep its way into how we live. But is that how God wants us to live? No, it isn’t. God wants us to depend on Him for everything we need. I am not talking about things like how as kids you need to depend on your parents for food, or clothes, or getting you to school, or those kinds of things.

I’m talking about the attitude we can get which pushes people away and says, “I can do this by myself. Go away!” God created us to need each other, and He created us to need Him. Second Peter 1:3 tells us, “For as you know him better, he will give you, through his great power, everything you need for living a truly good life.” The more you get to know Jesus, the more of His power He gives you to be able to live an awesome life.

So make sure as you grow up and learn to become independent, you do it God’s way and not man’s way. Ask the Holy Spirit inside of you to warn you, any time you start thinking you are too independent to need others or God, so you can have all the power you need to live the life God put you here on earth to live.

July 1, 2015 by Laura Diehl Leave a Comment

The Hidden Beauty of Fractals

Fractals? The first time I heard of this word was in the book The Shack, by William P. Young. I had no idea what it meant. Since then, I have come to not only know the meaning in my head, but to understand its deep implications in my heart.

So what exactly is a fractal? I really can’t tell you. I am a very simple minded person, and it seems unless you are a scientist or a mathematician (and I am neither one of those) the definition is hard to grasp.

We all know if we need information in today’s world, we Google it. So here is some of what I found for definitions of the word fractal.

$fractal6$ “Any of various extremely irregular curves or shapes for which any suitably chosen part is similar in shape to a given larger or smaller part when magnified or reduced to the same size.” (Merriam-Webster)

“An object whose parts, at infinitely many levels of magnification, appear geometrically similar to the whole. Fractals are useful in modeling structures (such as eroded coastlines or snowflakes) in which similar patterns recur at progressively smaller scales, and in describing partly random or chaotic phenomena such as crystal growth, fluid turbulence, and galaxy formation.” (Yahoo Dictionary)

So are you like me, and have to read the definitions slowly, and think about what you are reading? (If you want to pursue the definition further, you can find a whole slew of similar definitions by going here. thefreedictionary.com/fractal)

But I did find one definition that seemed to use more simple terms I could understand.

“A fractal is a natural phenomenon or a mathematical set that $fractal8$ exhibits a repeating pattern that displays at every scale.” (Thank you, Wikipedia.)

So, putting all of this together, my understanding is that a fractal is a pattern which looks similar as a whole, but when examined at a deeper level, each piece is actually unique.

That brings me to something I have always enjoyed.

$fractal3$ From the time I was a little girl, I am easily mesmerized by kaleidoscopes. I just love them, and have continued to buy them, even as an adult. Imagine my thrill when I discovered there are actually videos of these images set to music! (The Splendor of Color Kaleidoscope)

One day while watching one of these videos, I asked God why I love kaleidoscopes so much. He so graciously shared these seven things with me.

All the broken pieces are made into something exquisitely beautiful
Constant change doesn’t have to be something bad to dread, but something wonderful if I have the eyes to see it
The patterns created are limitless, just like He is limitless in my life
The external movement of force creates the internal movement of beauty
It causes me to pause from whatever I am in the middle of, and just rest in the beauty of what is in front of me
The changing swirling colors are a way on earth to have a representation of the beauty of the colors in heaven
If I do my part, I am rewarded with the beauty of the kaleidoscope doing what it was made to do

Sounds kind of like a fractal to me; irregular pieces coming together to make a beautiful pattern for others to enjoy.

It also sounds a lot like my life. No wonder I love kaleidoscopes and fractals.

How about you? Do you see yourself as a bunch of broken pieces God is using to turn into a beautiful fractal?

And by the way, those who know me well, know that I am very naive and childlike when it comes to the “ways of the world”. Some people (including Christians) believe that is a bad thing in today’s world. I am thankful to be pure and innocent in so many areas most people are not. I say this, because I was quite surprised to read below the kaleidoscope video that it is used mostly to enhance the experience of those on drugs. I have no problem taking what was meant for the kingdom of darkness and bringing it into the Kingdom of Light!