The day this episode is released, my daughter, Becca, would be 39 years old. Instead, she is forever 29. Three of Becca’s siblings are now older than their big sister, with one more sibling yet to hit that marker.
The birthdays of our children are painful and bittersweet. We are so thankful for the day they came into our lives, but we won’t be celebrating with them, doing things like serving them a special cake or buying gifts and a card for them. It hurts more than can be put into words that all we have now are past birthday memories, and won’t be making any new ones. (And if you had a pregnancy or infant loss, you don’t even have that… I am so sorry!)
In this episode, I talk about some of the struggles we have with our child’s birthday, along with some words of encouragement on why it is important to still celebrate the special day our child came into this world, even when those around us don’t understand why we want to acknowledge the birthday of our child who has died.
Having some sort of launch (like bio-degradable balloons, lanterns, or butterflies), eating their favorite food or watching their favorite movie are great ways to celebrate and remember our child on their birthday, but I also share a small handful of unique ideas on other special things you can do that day.
Happy Birthday, Becca-Boo! We love you and miss you like crazy!
Links Mentioned in this episode:
Listen to Laura’s song Together Forever.
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Birthdays:
Becca Diehl Howard was born on April 13 and is forever 29.
Rachel Pilcher was born on April 13 and is forever 40.
Carter Braun was born on April 13 and is forever 15.
Brandon Matos was born on April 14 and is forever 23.
If you would like your child mentioned on the podcast the week of his or her birthday, click here to fill out the short form with the needed information.
The special song written for our children’s birthdays I Remember Well can be heard here.
Remember to Hold On Pain Eases; there is HOPE!
To have Laura come and minister at your event, contact us at office@gpshope.org.
Grieving Parents Sharing Hope (GPS Hope) is here to walk with parents through the darkness of child-loss, guiding them to a place of hope, light and purpose.
It is a safe place for anyone who has lost a child from this earth. There is no shame or judgment in where you are in this journey, including if you are struggling in your relationship with God or your faith has been completely shattered.
For many Christians, when they say “God is good,” it means God won’t let anything really bad happen to me in this life. So, when a tragedy happens (like our house burning down to the ground, or the death of our child), we decide He isn’t really good, because a good God wouldn’t do this to me.
Times of suffering are when the devil really attacks our thoughts. “If God really loved you, you wouldn’t be going through this.” “If God was really good, He wouldn’t have let this happen.” The truth is, both believers in Christ and nonbelievers can face extreme hardships. Being a Christian does not mean that we won the lottery to a trouble-free life here on this earth. That would not be love, that would be bribery on God’s part.
that He allowed His Son to be brutally beaten and endure a torturous death, so that we could be reunited with our children forever. The act itself of Jesus being beaten and hung on a cross was not good, but the eternal fruit of Jesus entering hell to snatch the keys of hell and death, and His resurrection certainly was good!
So, the question remains: Is God good all the time? The enemy who is trying to get you to turn your back on God (the same enemy who brought death, pain and darkness into this world) wants to you to think no, He is not good. That is why Satan is the enemy. He has plans and tactics to turn you away from God and His love for you and your child, and he knows the death of your child makes you a much easier target to be able to do that.
