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GPS Hope

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November 3, 2020 by Laura Diehl 2 Comments

81: Seven Shifts in How You See God

When our child dies, we start out in such a place of darkness and eventually have moments we see light or hope, and then fall back into that darkness. Along with that, many of us have a hard time seeing or finding God in all of the pain and confusion.

No one has all the answers to our questions of “Why?”. So instead of being stuck there, it can be helpful to change some of our perspectives, which is what I talk about in this episode.

Seeing things through God’s eyes is always better than through our own. We need to ask Him for His eyes, and then give Him time to show us.

I don’t expect you to connect with all seven of them, but my prayer is that one or two of these thoughts will help you move toward having more hope and light in your life on your way to learning how to live a life of meaning and purpose once again.

This is not in spite of your child’s death, but because of his or her life!

Links Mentioned in this episode:

Click the link below to go to:

Rebuilding Your Life After the Death of Your Child courses

  • Course One – How Do I Even Start to Rebuild My Life?
  • Course Two – Working Through the Darkness
  • Course Three – Looking Toward My Future

GPS Hope website: gpshope.org

 

Please remember to give this podcast a rating and review to help other parents who are looking for something that will encourage them.

Click here to become a monthly partner, giving hope to other parents, or to give a special gift to keep this podcast going, along with providing  other needed resources to bereaved parents.

(GPS Hope is a 501c3 nonprofit and runs on the financial support of those who believe in passing along the hope they have received to others.)

 

Birthdays:

It is a bit unusual, but there are none to announce this week!

 

If you would like your child mentioned on the podcast the week of his or her birthday, click here to fill out the short form with the needed information.

The special song written for our children’s birthdays I Remember Well can be heard here.

Remember to Hold On Pain Eases; there is HOPE!

www.gpshope.org

 

To have Laura come and minister at your event, contact us at office@gpshope.org.

Grieving Parents Sharing Hope (GPS Hope) is here to walk with parents through the darkness of child-loss, guiding them to a place of hope, light and purpose.

It is a safe place for anyone who has lost a child from this earth. There is no shame or judgment in where you are in this journey, including if you are struggling in your relationship with God or your faith has been completely shattered.

November 1, 2020 by Laura Diehl Leave a Comment

What I Learned in Hindsight that Might Help You

~ by BJ Jensen

Hindsight is a good teacher.  If I had to relive those first special dates over again since Jay died in 1995 (I pray I will not ever have to), I would approach them differently, utilizing some of the following bits of wisdom gleaned over time:

I would not expect everyone to remember Jay’s birth date or death date like I do.

I see now how I set myself up for feeling more disappointment or failure.  Those dates cannot possible mean as much to other people as they do to his own mother.  It is not fair on my part to expect that.

I would voice my thoughts or concerns that jay’s birthday or “birth into heaven” date was coming up and that I was feeling fragile or sad or lonely.

It has not been fair of me to want people to “read my mind” and guess why I’m blue.  Personally, I don’t know any mind readers, and don’t think I will ever know any.  It would have been more appropriate for me to tell those I wanted to share my heart with.  I would have saved me more grief when they didn’t remember.

I would have planned special things for those special days instead of thinking that I should sit at home by myself and cry.

A walk on Jay’s favorite beach at sunset with a friend, or a picnic at Jay’s favorite park with some of his friends would have helped me remember some of the good times instead of focusing on the bad.

I would have done something nice for someone who was feeling lonely or sad or didn’t have a friend – a trip out to lunch or to a movie.

I would have focused more on the good memories instead of the hurtful ones. 

When I focused on what I didn’t have, it produced unhappiness and discontent.  When I focused on what I did have, it produced gratitude.

I would have realized it was okay for me to cry and it was okay to desire to have Jay back, even though it held me captive in selfishness. 

It was okay – but only for a time.  I then had to make a truly hard decision to focus on helping others less fortunate.  The more time I spent focused inwardly on myself and the loss of our son, the more I seemed to spiral downward into the pit of self-pity and despair.  I had already spent too much time there and hated the darkness.  I now know I would have helped myself recover sooner and with less stress if I had spent more time focused outwardly.

I would have joined a support group sooner.

I would not have isolated myself from the very ones who wanted to help me.  My family of origin had taught me to segregate myself from others when I was sad.  However, I now believe we are made for community and for helping each other through the tough times.

We try to honor our son’s life by doing the best we can with the rest of our lives. We sometimes ask ourselves the question, “Would our choices and decisions in our lives today make Jay proud of us?”

We treasure memories of Jay and allow ourselves to reminisce, get nostalgic, and be thankful for the time we had with him, even though it wasn’t long enough. Whatever time we had with our departed child would never have been long enough.

Surviving special dates the first few years after the death of your child may seem like an impossible task. In some ways it’s like climbing a steep mountain or navigating on a churning ocean. But it can be done. So many others have had to climb that mountain or traverse those treacherous waters and are stronger for having made it to the far shore. We want to encourage you and give you hope that it can be done. That small tender shoot of hope will grow when nurtured and fertilized.

 

This was taken by permission from the book Finding Hope After the Devastating Loss of Beloved Children by Dr. Doug and BJ Jensen. Click here to find it on Amazon. (This is an affiliate link. GPS Hope will get a small percentage of your purchase by using it.)

 

Doug and BJ Jensen, are International Speakers, award-winning Dramatists, Signing Artists, Song Writers, Drama Writers, and Authors of 16 books. Dr. Jensen earned his PhD in Biblical Studies in the area of Biblical Counseling.  BJ is the Director of the world traveling LOVE IN MOTION Signing Choir and is a writer of 8 stories found in seven of the CHICKEN SOUP FOR THE SOUL books. You can contact them at Jensen2@san.rr.com or on their Facebook page: Bj Jensen San Diego.

We would like to send you a PDF of Thirty Ways to Bring Ourselves Comfort and Take Care of Ourselves. Please let us know below where to send it. (You will also join over 1000 other parents who receive a Weekly Word of Hope.)

Expressions of Hope is provided by Grieving Parents Sharing Hope (GPS Hope). The founders, Dave and Laura Diehl, travel full time in their Hope Mobile (a 38-foot motor home) to be more easily available for speaking and ministry requests, and bringing intimate weekend retreats to bereaved parents. Laura is also a singer/songwriter and the author of multiple award-winning books.

If you would like more information about bringing Dave and Laura to you for an event, please send an email to office@gpshope.org.

If you are interested in bringing GPS Hope to your area for a weekend retreat click here.

 

  • Check out the Grieving Parents Sharing Hope weekly podcast
  • Subscribe to Laura’s YouTube channel. 
  • If you are a bereaved parent, we encourage you to connect with us on Facebook.
  • If you are not a bereaved parent but want to support those who are, or want to follow us as we give hope to these precious parents, please connect with us at Friends of GPS Hope on Facebook.

 

Filed Under: Expressions of Hope Tagged With: bereaved parent special dates, child death anniversary, child loss support group, community support for grief, coping with grief, grief recovery, grief strategies, grief wisdom, grieving a child, Grieving Mothers, healing after loss, helping others in grief, honoring a child’s memory, honoring your child’s life, life after loss, loss of a child, navigating grief, remembering a child, special dates after loss

October 27, 2020 by Laura Diehl Leave a Comment

80: Spouses and Grief (with Dave Diehl)

At GPS Hope, we get emails from those of you who are struggling in your marriage after the death of your child, or who have questions about how your spouse is grieving. So, I decided it was time to do a podcast episode on this topic.

Of course, this means I got to bring in my other half to talk about this subject, as my husband Dave joins me to share his side of things.

In our workshops, Dave and I like to use the acronym T-O-G-E-T-H-E-R to bring up eight points on how to understand each other and strengthen your marriage during this dark and difficult time, which we share with you in this episode. We pray it will help you on your grief journey together.

Dave Diehl is retired from a career of over thirty years in IT. He is the cofounder of GPS Hope, and is much of the “behind-the-scenes” support, including technical support for the ministry, and driving the Hope Mobile. Dave wrote a chapter in Laura’s book When Tragedy Strikes, and ministers directly to grieving fathers around the nation at the GPS Hope & Healing retreats.

 

Links Mentioned in this episode:

Tale of Two Brains video with Mark Gungor

Information on The Grief Cruise in Dec. 2021 with GPS Hope

GPS Hope website: gpshope.org

 

Please remember to give this podcast a rating and review to help other parents who are looking for something that will encourage them.

Click here to become a monthly partner, giving hope to other parents, or to give a special gift to keep this podcast going, along with providing  other needed resources to bereaved parents.

(GPS Hope is a 501c3 nonprofit and runs on the financial support of those who believe in passing along the hope they have received to others.)

Birthdays:

Dawson Morris was born on October 29 and is forever 19.

Donice Vaughan was born on October 29 and is forever 30.

Marisa Diaz was born on October 29 and is forever 20.

Zen Dylan Koh was born on November 1 and is forever 17.

 

If you would like your child mentioned on the podcast the week of his or her birthday, click here to fill out the short form with the needed information.

The special song written for our children’s birthdays I Remember Well can be heard here.

Remember to Hold On Pain Eases; there is HOPE!

www.gpshope.org

 

To have Laura come and minister at your event, contact us at office@gpshope.org.

Grieving Parents Sharing Hope (GPS Hope) is here to walk with parents through the darkness of child-loss, guiding them to a place of hope, light and purpose.

It is a safe place for anyone who has lost a child from this earth. There is no shame or judgment in where you are in this journey, including if you are struggling in your relationship with God or your faith has been completely shattered.

October 20, 2020 by Laura Diehl 2 Comments

79: Five Suggestions for When You are Told, “You Should be Over This by Now”

So often I hear the frustration of bereaved parents who are hurt and angry because people around them think they should be doing better than they are, even as early as 3 or 4 months, on up to the first few years.

This episode addresses this difficult issue, with some ideas of things that can help you deal with these kinds of ignorant remarks.

Links Mentioned in this episode:

To get a list of my top ten recommended books from a couple years ago (or to let me know what book(s) helped you), email me at laura@gpshope.org.

GPS Hope website: gpshope.org

Find out more about My Grief Journey: A Coloring Book and Journal for Bereaved Parents

Find our more about Come Grieve Through Our Eyes

Expressions of Hope blog with these five things as a printable download.

 

Please remember to give this podcast a rating and review to help other parents who are looking for something that will encourage them.

Click here to become a monthly partner, giving hope to other parents, or to give a special gift to keep this podcast going, along with providing  other needed resources to bereaved parents.

(GPS Hope is a 501c3 nonprofit and runs on the financial support of those who believe in passing along the hope they have received to others.)

 

Birthdays:

Taylor Contreras was born on October 20 and is forever 16.

Mckenzie Aucapina was born on October 21 and is forever 7 ½.

Matthew Sulikowski was born on October 22 and is forever 36.

Nate Wilson was born on October 22 and is forever 30.

Dustin Clements was born on October 26 and is forever 21.

 

If you would like your child mentioned on the podcast the week of his or her birthday, click here to fill out the short form with the needed information.

The special song written for our children’s birthdays I Remember Well can be heard here.

Remember to Hold On Pain Eases; there is HOPE!

www.gpshope.org

 

To have Laura come and minister at your event, contact us at office@gpshope.org.

Grieving Parents Sharing Hope (GPS Hope) is here to walk with parents through the darkness of child-loss, guiding them to a place of hope, light and purpose.

It is a safe place for anyone who has lost a child from this earth. There is no shame or judgment in where you are in this journey, including if you are struggling in your relationship with God or your faith has been completely shattered.

October 13, 2020 by Laura Diehl Leave a Comment

78. The Dance with Grief (with Erica Mitchell)

This week is a continuation of last week’s episode as I talked with Erica Mitchell. Erica had a pregnancy loss and had to deliver her stillborn son, which was pretty traumatic.

Last week we ended in the middle of Erica’s story of God allowing her to see her son, Sheldon, in heaven. She was so angry that He would dare to show her that, after taking her son from her.

This episode starts with God’s response to Erica, and then continues as she shares  about her struggle with the grief and how God has helped her through the darkness.

She also tells us about their rainbow baby, Zoey, and her traumatic birth, how they almost lost Zoey, and also and the fears Erica had to fight during that time.

Instead of pushing God away during these times of pain and confusion, Erica chose to draw as close to Him as she could. This has allowed her to be able to minister in a deep way to others who have lost a child or been through a traumatic event in their lives.

We are all on our own journey of child loss, but we all need hope in our place of darkness, which I pray you will receive in hearing Erica’s story.

Erica Mitchell is a daughter of the King. She loves being a wife of 9 years to Justin and the mother to 3 sons: Shylo 8, Shay 6, Sheldon (growing up in heaven) and rainbow baby girl Zoey. She believes worship is a lifestyle and loves to create with lyrics, music, and makeup. She has a calling and anointing in her words and voice to encourage and bring freedom to others in their personal relationship with Jesus. Her faith and heavenly perspective are contagious and overflows into all areas of her life.

 

(Note: The views and opinions of our guests outside of this podcast may not be in agreement with GPS Hope.) 
Links Mentioned in this episode:

Read a recent Expressions of Hope blog written by Erica: Child Loss, PTSD and God.

Connect with Erica on Facebook  or email her at: jemitchell4ev@yahoo.com.

Find out how to have an In Loving Memory heart placed on the Hope Mobile for your child.

Contact us to let us know if you live in one of the areas mentioned so we can plan to get together by emailing office@gpshope.org

Please remember to give this podcast a rating and review to help other parents who are looking for something that will encourage them.

Click here to become a monthly partner, giving hope to other parents, or to give a special gift to keep this podcast going, along with providing  other needed resources to bereaved parents.

(GPS Hope is a 501c3 nonprofit and runs on the financial support of those who believe in passing along the hope they have received to others.)

 

Birthdays:

Joshua Kirkendall was born on October 6 and is forever 14.

Isaac Cojocarescu was born on October 14 and is forever 10.

Bub Amis was born on October 16 and is forever 36.

 

If you would like your child mentioned on the podcast the week of his or her birthday, click here to fill out the short form with the needed information.

The special song written for our children’s birthdays I Remember Well can be heard here.

Remember to Hold On Pain Eases; there is HOPE!

www.gpshope.org

 

To have Laura come and minister at your event, contact us at office@gpshope.org.

Grieving Parents Sharing Hope (GPS Hope) is here to walk with parents through the darkness of child-loss, guiding them to a place of hope, light and purpose.

It is a safe place for anyone who has lost a child from this earth. There is no shame or judgment in where you are in this journey, including if you are struggling in your relationship with God or your faith has been completely shattered.

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