Gems from the Crown Archives - Page 8 of 11

August 19, 2015 by Laura Diehl 4 Comments

How Do I Know What Decision to Make?

God says perseverance is a sign of maturity. Sometimes that perseverance means to stick it out where we are, and sometimes it means we need to inconvenience ourselves to shift our position. So how do we know what to do in this type of circumstance?

“Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything” James 1:4. The next verse answers the question on how to know what to do. “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” Pray for God’s wisdom and His guidance. He will show you if things are going to settle down soon so you can stay where you are, or if there are some steps you can take to move you where you need to be to get away from those distractions. He knows exactly where you need to be, and when you need to be there; and He is not going to be upset with you for asking Him for directions.

As Christians, we love to quote James 1:5, claiming God promises to give us wisdom. Some of God’s promises are unconditional. In other words, we don’t have to do anything on our end for God to follow through. However, James 1:5 is not one of those promises, and yet it is very rare to hear Christians claiming God promises to give us wisdom with His conditions attached.

Verse six reads, “But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.”

Raise your hand if that describes you at times. I am raising mine! The condition to receiving the true wisdom of God is to believe and not doubt that God is giving you direction, and follow through with it. Take that step of faith, (or stand your ground in faith if God is telling you to stay put).

I am reading Enjoying Where You Are on the Way to Where You are Going by Joyce Meyers. Here is what she has to say about this scripture. “Double mindedness is confusing, yet decision-making can be simple…indecision and double mindedness not only bring confusion and complication, but, as James noted, they also bring condemnation.”

In other words, we should not believe something in our hearts, and then allow our minds to talk us out of it. Make a decision, and move forward. Don’t get caught in the trap of indecisiveness.

I like how the Philips translation words it. “But he must ask in sincere faith without secret doubts as to whether he really wants God’s help or not. The man who trusts God, but with inward reservations, is like a wave of the sea, carried forward by the wind one moment and driven back the next.” We have to truly want God’s help, and then act on that inner voice of the Holy Spirit, without doubting.

We need to stop living in fear of making the wrong decision, which causes us to be paralyzed and not move forward. That is exactly what James was saying, when he talked about being double minded and unstable.

God is faithful. If you are truly seeking His will, go ahead and take a step of faith in obedience to what you believe you are hearing. If it is the wrong step, He will lovingly change your direction, getting you on the path He has for you.

In the natural, let’s say you have a child who is looking for something, and you know where it is. When he asks you, you will direct him to it. If he misunderstood you, and starts heading in the opposite direction, you wouldn’t just think, “Oh well! Too bad he didn’t hear me,” and let him keep wandering. You would get his attention and make sure he understands, sending him in the right direction.

God is a good and perfect Father. If you want His perfect wisdom, He will give it to you, just for the asking, as long as you are asking in sincere faith without doubting as to whether or not you really want His help, or doubting your ability to receive it.

The results of not believing God will give you the wisdom you are asking for can be found in verse eight. “That sort of man cannot hope to receive anything from God, and the life of a man of divided loyalty will reveal instability at every turn.”

I am sure this is not the result you or I want to have. So let’s believe when we ask God for wisdom and direction, He gives it to us, and will make sure we hear Him clearly. And then let’s be sure we take a step of faith, trusting He will continue to guide us if we take a wrong step. After all, He is not only just a good Father, but a perfect Father!

August 12, 2015 by Laura Diehl Leave a Comment

Yes, It IS About Me

As Christians, we hear quite often, “It’s not about you. It’s all about Him.” We even lift our hands as we sing worship songs that indicate this. I may be stirring up a Christian bee’s nest, but I don’t fully believe that. Let me tell you why.

God refers to us as the following:

We are His children (and He is our Abba, Father)
We are His sheep
We are His friends
We are the Bride of His Son

If it is all about Him, and not about us,

Why did Jesus tell us He was leaving so the Holy Spirit could come and live inside each one of us?
Why did God make a covenant with us, putting Himself on both sides of it so that we can’t get out of it?
Why didn’t God just leave us in sin after Adam and Eve disobeyed Him?
Why did Jesus say He came to seek and save those who were lost?
Why does God encourage us through Paul to run the race and finish well?
Why did Jesus say He was going to prepare a place for us to live with Him forever?
Why are we told what signs to look for to let us know Jesus’ return is getting close?
Why bother sending the Holy Spirit at all, to lead and guide us into all truth?

Why? Because God is a personal God, who wants a personal, intimate relationship with each one of us.

In God’s eyes, life here on earth is about you, and it is about me!

Yes, we walk by faith, and not by sight. Yes, we are not to live our lives based on feelings. But the ability to have feelings and emotions came from God. When you hear someone say, “It’s not about you. It’s about Him,” how does that make you feel? Do you feel closer to God? Probably not.

When a daughter wants her daddy’s attention, how would she feel if he tells her, “It doesn’t matter what you want. It isn’t about you; it’s about me and what I want. Leave me alone!”?

If a person contacts his or her best friend to ask them to hang out, is it normal for that friend to say, “It doesn’t matter what you want. It’s not about you and what you want to do.”?

Would a groom tell his new wife on their honeymoon, “This marriage isn’t about you. It’s all about me and what I want out of it!”?

Of course not!

Then why do we think our relationship with God is all about Him and none of it is about us?

If it’s not about you, who did Jesus come to die for? Why did God give us the written Word to teach us how to live in a way that brings us His blessings? Why do we seek Him to find out what gifts He has placed in us and what He created us to do and be while living on this earth?

God wants us to come to him with our fears, our anxieties, our burdens, our sicknesses, our loneliness, and any other negative thoughts and feelings we have, so that He can exchange them for His peace, joy, health, mercy, compassion, and unconditional extravagant love!

Now that I think about it, that actually sounds like a pretty one-sided relationship. This exchange makes it sound like it is almost all about you and me!

But it isn’t just about you or me. And it isn’t just about Him. It is all about the relationship. It is all about “we” and “us.”

This understanding is not something that inflates our ego and makes us strut with pride. Instead, it is something very humbling, which causes us to want to love Him deeply in return, to worship Him and live our lives for Him.

And so, we discover it is all about being caught up in a circle of love. The more we receive His love, the more we want to return it, which opens the door for us to receive even more from Him, which causes us to be even more in love with Him, and on it goes.

Yes, it IS about me, and you, AND God. Aren’t you thankful for that?

August 5, 2015 by Laura Diehl Leave a Comment

How Important is a Sense of Community?

I recently had the need to “run away.” I had a lot on my plate and also had some things that were weighing heavily on my heart. The busyness of day-to-day life compounded things, until I found myself completely overwhelmed.

We couldn’t afford for me to go stay at a hotel to get away for a few days. As I asked God to show me how to get some time away, which I so desperately needed, I realized my mom was heading to Ohio to visit my sister, leaving her place unoccupied for a week. So I packed my things and went to stay there for several days of quietness, prayer, reading, writing, reflection…you get the idea.

Every morning, I would go out for a long walk around the mobile home subdivision she lives in. The last morning as I was walking, someone drove past me with a huge smile and a big wave, and I smiled and waved back. My thought was, “You have no clue who I am, so why are you so excited to see me?”

I realized it was because the driver probably believed that if I was out walking in this subdivision, I lived there. She had the unconscious thought, “You must be one of us, you are part of our community” and therefore offered the joyful greeting from her car.

I had a Mini Cooper for five years. (Yes, sweet!) I loved that car! As the owner of a Mini, whenever you pass someone else driving a Mini, you wave at them. It’s a big deal to be the owner of such a car, and a community is built around it. Dave and I did several Mini Cooper rallies, where we would meet up with dozens or even hundreds of other Mini owners, and all drive somewhere together. At one of these rallies we even got to drive on the Indy 500 track!

It’s the same thing with Harley Davidson. One of my sons is a Harley technician, and in the summer once a month they have a rally, where hundreds of Harley owners come from all around to hang out together. If you own a Harley, you are automatically part of their community.

I looked up the word community, and here is one of the definitions: a feeling of fellowship with others, as a result of sharing common attitudes, interests, and goals (Oxford Dictionaries).

Community gives us a sense of belonging. We all have a need, a craving, to know we belong somewhere.

The Body of Christ should be our greatest sense of community. It should be a place where we feel in fellowship with others, as a result of the commonality of our relationship and love for Jesus.

But do we? Unfortunately, many people do not. They have the commonality, but not the fellowship of community.

Why is that? Could it be that we have unwittingly reverted back to the way of the Pharisees that Jesus called hypocrites? Are we so busy being the Holy Spirit to those around us who profess Jesus as their Savior, making sure they do and don’t do what He has convicted us of, that it is a bunch of rules and regulations, instead of relationship?

The other day, I was talking to someone in my parents’ generation who began to share with me her frustration at the lack of young people in her church. I told her that I think it is because we have tried to teach our kids about the rules of religion, instead of the gift of relationship. Rules without relationship breeds rebellion.

When someone first comes to know Jesus in a real way, telling God they want to live for Him instead of themselves and inviting Him into their lives, we are all happy and excited for them (as we should be)! But then we immediately start telling them what they should and should not do, to be able to remain as part of our church community, under the label of being a Christian. If they don’t follow our rules fast enough, they start feeling uncomfortable, and end up leaving.

I am not talking about things in the Bible God outright calls sin and wants us to come away from to avoid our own destruction. I am talking about things like not wearing flip-flops to church. Yes, I actually had a conversation with someone on this very subject. Her argument was that a person would not wear something as casual as flip-flops to visit a dignitary, and since God is so much greater, He should be honored in the same way. Therefore, we need to dress up (which includes no flip-flops) for church.

Things like abstaining from all alcohol (which my husband and I do, not because we think it is a sin, but it is just our personal choice) or getting certain body piercings or a tattoo are other common areas of “how can you call yourself a Christian and do that?” type of subjects. We even had a friend many years ago who had this attitude about home schooling, laying a guilt trip on any Christian who sent their children to government (public) schools!

Here’s a thought. How about if we focus on relationships instead of rules? Yes, I know there is a need for accountability, teaching, instruction, and correction. But the black-and-white (and red lettering) Word of God is the measuring stick for that. Our own convictions in areas that do not make or break a person’s relationship with God should not become unwritten rules of the community of the Body of Christ, causing broken fellowship and division.

Many years ago, my husband and I were members of our local curling club (a sport played on ice). I felt like I had better fellowship and sense of community and belonging there in the clubhouse (drinking my soda) than I did in my church at times. I was accepted and welcomed just the way I was. No one was trying to conform me into their own image of who they thought I should be as a curler, like I felt was happening to me in the church as a Christian. How sad is that? Fortunately, I was strong enough to recognize how dangerous the pull of that was, so it did not cause me to give up on being part of the Church.

But many people don’t have that insight, and decide that the acceptance of community in the world is so much better than the acceptance of community (or lack of it) in the church. That is not what Christ intended, and I am sure it grieves Him greatly.

Everyone needs to belong to a group who will accept them the way they are. I cannot change a person’s heart. I cannot change a person’s motive. I cannot change a person’s convictions. Only the Holy Spirit can do that, and He does it quite well. As a matter of fact, that is His specialty.

What I can do is love someone into the Kingdom, and then continue to love them the way they are, while the Holy Spirit does the internal work. It does no good to get someone to conform on the outside, with no change on the inside.

People should not have to go outside the church and into the world to have that craving of belonging to a community to be filled. Let’s be determined to make sure our churches are a true place of community, where people know they are wanted and belong, for the simple fact that we are all “living in the same subdivision”. We are all in relationship with God through the covenant blood of Jesus Christ. That is what makes us part of His community; plain and simple.

July 29, 2015 by Laura Diehl Leave a Comment

Seven Ways to Shift From Fear to Faith (Part 2)

We know fear does not come from God. And yet we all go through trials and difficulties that can cause us to fight fear.

The greatest trial of my life came with the death of our oldest daughter. In part one, I shared the first five of seven things that pulled me out of that place of dark confusion and back into a place of faith in the Living God and His plans for my life. (Click here to read part one.)

6. Don’t try to hide from your fears or pretend they aren’t there.

God wants you to bring all your feelings to Him, even the ones you wish you didn’t have. You may be wondering, He knows these things already. Why should I have to tell Him how I am feeling? Because you need to admit those things so you can give them to God and let Him work with you at being set free. Fear and anxiety come from the enemy of your soul. When you take these feelings to God, it is a way of affirming your trust in Him, regardless of how you feel. If you do this persistently, those tormenting feelings of fear will eventually lose their hold on you, and you will find your feelings lining up with faith.

7. Claim the promises of God, not based on how you feel, but based on the truth of what God says.

I have chosen to believe Romans 8:18, which tells me the sufferings of this present time cannot be compared with the glory that will be revealed in me. And I have written in the margin of one of my Bibles that I am not waiting for the glory of heaven, but I am looking for the power of His glory to be revealed in me while I am still here on this earth!

How about the promise of Jesus telling us He will never leave us or forsake us (Hebrews 13:5)? That is not a promise based on conditions. It is set and firm, no matter what we choose to do or not do. He is our constant companion and source of everything we need during this time. The question is not “Where is God?” The question is “Where am I?” I can walk out on Him very easily, and many of us do. We ignore Him, as though He is no longer with us. That is never the case. Guess who moved away? (Hint: it’s not God.)

What fears are you carrying right now? Are they things God would have you carry? Let me answer that for you. No, they are not. So are you willing to lay them down at the feet of Jesus, who is sitting on His throne as King, and leave them there so you can move forward in freedom?

There is freedom in surrender. I have experienced that in my life over and over again. It is like we are digging through the garbage, trying to survive, when God wants to hand us a steak. But we won’t take it because we don’t want to give up the garbage. Crazy, isn’t it? But that is what we do when we refuse to allow God to take something like our fears from us. He always replaces it with something better. If you say yes and hand over those fears, God can move in and begin to turn things around for you. (Hmm…that makes me think of another promise you can claim in Romans 8:28.)

There are some things we need to give to God for Him to do, but there are also things we can do ourselves. Right now you can speak to the mountain of fear in your life. Tell the lies behind that fear that you are going to believe the truth: God’s perfect love for you casts out all fear! (1 John 4:18)

I refuse to remain focused on the pain of my loss. I am determined to go forward, focused on who and what I still have. I have given God the shattered pieces of my life and am watching Him not only fix it, but make it into something even more beautiful than it was before. Only a God who specializes in miracles can do that!

I also refuse to live in fear of the “what ifs” of more loss. If that happens, I know that I know that I know God will give me the grace I need to get through it. Why waste my time on the darkness of fearing what will probably never happen? I would much rather live my life full of light and hope of a better tomorrow. You and I both are blessed with so much that has not been taken from us.

Fear and faith require the same emotion, which is belief in the unknown.

Which “unknown” are you going to believe in and act on? I recommend faith.

What promise in the Word of God are you standing on in faith? I would love to have you share it with me in the comments below.

Note: This was adapted from Laura’s book When Tragedy Strikes which will be available in bookstores everywhere early 2016. Click here for more information.

July 22, 2015 by Laura Diehl 6 Comments

Seven Ways to Shift From Fear to Faith (Part 1)

Almost four years ago our oldest daughter left this earth. Having a child die brings many deep and intense emotions that cannot be described. Since that time I have connected with other parents who have also lost a child. One of the things this very unnatural and painful loss can cause is fear, on many levels.

We all go through trials and difficulties that can cause us to fight fear. I want to share with you a few things to help make a shift in how you see God in the midst of any fear caused by the pain of a tragedy, trauma, or severe difficulty in life.

1. Perspective can change everything.

It may not seem like it, but our perspective is a choice we make. You can choose to either hang on to a perspective that gives you lots of torment, or ask God to see your situation with a different set of eyes (hopefully His).I can either focus on my personal loss that my child is permanently absent from this earth, or I can focus on the fact that my child is absent from this earth but present with the Lord, and even though the pain is intense, I will meet up with my child again in our eternal home, never to be separated again.

2. Being able to take my needs and my fears to God in prayer makes a big difference in my life.

I think of Peter’s answer when Jesus asked His twelve followers, “Will you leave Me also?” Peter said, “Lord, who else can we go to? You have words that give life that lasts forever” (John 6:68 NLV). For many years I have said Jesus isn’t a crutch to me. He is my wheelchair. That is truer now than it has ever been.

It keeps me from feeling so helpless in a circumstance I have no control over. Praying gives me much more control over how I respond to my feelings and fears. It may be that the only thing I have control over is my communication with God, but that is actually enough.

3. Having the revelation that God always leads us into triumph makes a huge dent in our fears.

During a worship song at church one day, I suddenly realized that if I bring God into my battle (including the battle of my fears and my darkness) then I will win, because it is impossible for Him to lose! He is the Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end (Revelation 1:8). God has the first and last word in my life, and He also has it in the life of my child! God has never entered a battle where He came out as the loser, and He never will. As soon as I ask God to fight for me, I know somehow in the end I will come out victorious!

4. Reading the book of Psalms in the Bible can be extremely helpful.

Over and over the writer cries out for help from a very dark place of despair. And God responds by being a rock, a refuge and help in times of need. I spend a lot of time there when I “relapse” and find myself struggling with the pain and reality that Becca is gone and I won’t see her again until I join her in heaven.

5. Don’t keep looking back, allowing yourself to be paralyzed by the pain of the past, trying to stay in a place which no longer exists.

I am so sorry to say this, and I am not trying to be cruel, but simply want to set you free; no matter how much you want your life to go back to the way it was before your tragedy (such as my wanting my daughter’s life back) it isn’t going to happen.

When I did that, God reminded me of Lot’s wife. When she looked back to the tragedy she was leaving, she died immediately, being frozen (turned into a pillar of salt) to that place (Genesis 19:26). That is an extreme example, but continuing to look back, longing for the past that no longer exists will become a tormenting fear which will paralyze you from going forward. God told me not to keep looking back at my crushing blow, and if I continued to look back to ponder and relive the death of my daughter, I would not be able to walk in the power of His resurrection life.

The solution? Here is what I wrote in my journal as I heard God speak to me: Receive it! Just receive this new life I am giving you. You will grow stronger in it each day you come up to Me to drink. Drink daily. Drink deeply. For it will truly be a wellspring of life in you and through you. Cross over from death to life! Cross over from sorrow into joy! Cross over into new depths of My love and My will and My ways for your life.

Next week we will look at the last two ways to shift from fear to faith. In the meantime, what is something God is showing you His perspective on in your life that is giving you freedom from fear?

Note: This was adapted from Laura’s book When Tragedy Strikes which will be available in bookstores everywhere in July 2016. Click here for more information.