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December 6, 2020 by Laura Diehl 10 Comments

Four Things We Can Learn from the Mother of Jesus About Child Loss

This is the time of year we think about and celebrate the birth of Christ. But have you thought about the fact that we can relate to Mary through the eyes of a bereaved parent? I recently spent some time studying this out and discovered quite a bit about Mary that I had not realized or thought about, until I had a child who died.

First Observation

Mary did not have an easy life, and it was all because God gave her Jesus as her son! It started as soon as she conceived Jesus through the Holy Spirit.

  • Mary found herself as a young pregnant woman with no husband, which left her at the mercy of being stoned to death.
  • When she was “heavy with child” (fully pregnant), she was forced by law to travel from Nazareth to Bethlehem which was around an 80-90-mile journey of hills. (And transportation at that time sure wasn’t what it is today!)
  • The city was so crowded, there weren’t any hotel rooms available. Someone out of kindness offered his barn out back. This is where she gave birth to her very first child. I think I may have been close to being terrified if it were me. (Was Joseph able to find a midwife quick enough in a town he knew nothing about so at least one person knew what to do?)
  • If this is where Joseph had to go for the census, it means all of his family had to go there also. Where were they in all of this? Where did they stay? Why didn’t his family make sure he and Mary were taken care of? Could it be that they were ostracized because of her becoming pregnant out of wedlock, and instead of Joseph having her stoned, he married her anyway, to raise this illegitimate child as his own?
  • It seems that the first visitors were smelly shepherds… not her mom, a sibling, or someone we think as the normal first visitors, especially when it is the first child.
  • It seems her husband, Joseph, died at some point before Jesus’s ministry, since he is not included in any scriptures beyond when Jesus was 12. (The next time we see Jesus with his family, it was with his mother and brothers at a wedding.)
  • Based on Matthew 13:55 and Mark 6:3, Jesus had at least 6 siblings. Imagine being a widow with 7 children!
  • And beyond that, John 7:1-10 tells us that His brothers were not believers in who He At one point, they even went to go drag Jesus away from where He was because they thought He had literally lost His mind (Mark 3:20-21).That must have been SO hard for Mary, because that means her own children didn’t believe her story about the angel coming to her and being a virgin when Jesus was conceived in her by the Holy Spirit.

Thirty-three years after He was born, with such a hard life because of her first-born son, Mary is standing at an execution stake, watching that son being torturously executed for a crime he didn’t commit. (We need to remind ourselves here that she had no idea that Jesus was going to rise from the dead three days later. When He tried to tell his followers this, no one got it.)

Have you had a hard life? Maybe, like Mary, much of it was because of your child who died. The thing that resonates with me is that God gave Jesus to Mary, knowing the heartache she would have, both with His life and with His death.

We each have an appointed time to die; our days on earth are numbered. God knew those days when he placed your child in your womb, but He chose you to nurture that child and be his or her parent for those number of days. He also knew any sorrow and heartache your child would give you while he or she was alive.

Would you rather He chose someone else, and left you never knowing that precious son or daughter? I don’t think Mary would have thought that, and I don’t think you do, either.

You just might want to take a minute to thank God for giving you the gift of your child’s life, even though it meant going through the pain you have had to endure.

Second Observation

Twice in the Bible, we are told Mary pondered something in her heart about Jesus; she thought deeply about it, treasured it and wondered about it. The first (Luke 2:19), was when the shepherds came to worship her Son who had just been born in a smelly barn, was wrapped in strips of cloth and was using an animal feeding trough as His crib.

The second time (Luke 2:52) was when Jesus was twelve and was accidently left in Jerusalem and they didn’t realize it until they were already a day’s journey toward home.  That meant it took another day to get back to Jerusalem and it took them three days to find Him! I can’t even imagine the sheer panic she must have felt, not knowing for five days where her son was! (Unfortunately, some of you reading this may be able to relate to this.)

There is something really important between those two events we need to look at. When Joseph and Mary went to the temple to have Jesus dedicated to the Lord according to Jewish law with the first-born son, a prophet named Simeon told Mary a sword would pierce her heart. It doesn’t say Mary pondered that, but I am sure she must have!

It took over thirty years, but when her Son died, Mary felt the pain Simeon told her she would have – the piercing sword of grief that we all know too well.

After His death, do you think Mary spent time pulling up the memories of Jesus that we were told she pondered and treasured in her heart?

Memories are all that we now have of our children. We may not have some of the crazy memories that Mary did, but we have ones that are just as precious. At first, those memories can be so very painful! But I want to encourage you that it won’t always be that way. It takes a while, but at some point, those memories will warm your heart and make you smile. Thinking about your child won’t be as painful as it is now. Allow that to be a hope that rises up in you.

We will look at the other two things in the next blog.

Until then, you might be interested in listening to the podcast series People in the Bible Who Lost a Child. Just click on each individual episode below to read the description and listen to it directly on the GPS Hope website. (You can also find each one on your favorite podcast app. Just look for the Grieving Parents Sharing Hope podcast.)

49: The First Death in the Bible was a Son Who Was Murdered (Adam and Eve)
50: The Rainbow Baby in the Bible (King David lost an infant son before Solomon was born)
51: Three Things we Can Learn from Jesus’ Mother After the Death of Our Child
53: Trying to Find God in the Midst of Our Deepest Pain (A look at Job)
54: Why Did God Allow Me to Suffer Like This? (Job’s suffering after the death of all ten of his children)
55: From Fullness to Bitterness to Fullness Again (Naomi)
56: Reunited with Our Children (Jacob and Jairus)
57: Our Grief is the Same, Yet Different (two groups in the Bible who had children mass murdered)

 

Note: On each podcast, I announce the name, birthday and forever age of our children who are no longer here with us, the week of his or her birthday. If you would like to share your child with our listeners, just click here to fill out and submit the form with the needed information.

 

Expressions of Hope is written by author, speaker and singer Laura Diehl. She and her husband, Dave, are the founders of Grieving Parents Sharing Hope (GPS Hope). Dave and Laura travel full time in their Hope Mobile (a 38-foot motor home) to be more easily available for speaking and ministry requests, including being invited to hold one-day GPS Hope & Healing conferences.

 

If you would like more information about Laura as a speaker for your next event or want more information on hosting a GPS Hope & Healing conference, click here.

 

  • Check out the Grieving Parents Sharing Hope weekly podcast
  • If you are a bereaved parent, we encourage you to connect with us on Facebook.
  • If you are not a bereaved parent but want to support those who are, or want to follow us as we give hope to these precious parents, please connect with us at Friends of GPS Hope on Facebook.
  • Subscribe to Laura’s YouTube channel. 

 

Filed Under: Expressions of Hope

December 1, 2020 by Laura Diehl Leave a Comment

85: You Can Have Hope During the Christmas Season

You may not agree with the title of this podcast episode, but it really is true. You can have hope in your life again after child loss. And the Christmas season, as difficult as it can be, is a great time to have that hope infused into your heart and soul.

Each week during the advent season, I do a live candle lighting on Facebook (with the advent wreath we used in our home as our children grew up) and read an entry from the book Hope for the Future: An Advent Journey for Bereaved Parents.

This week’s episode is centered on the reading I did Sunday, November 29, and the topic is hope.

 

Links Mentioned in this episode:

Click here to find out more about the book Hope for the Future and the live advent readings.

Click here to purchase an eBook version of Hope for the Future directly from GPS Hope. (There is also a paperback version that can be ordered from your favorite book provider.)

GPS Hope website: gpshope.org

 

Please remember to give this podcast a rating and review to help other parents who are looking for something that will encourage them.

Click here to become a monthly partner, giving hope to other parents, or to give a special gift to keep this podcast going, along with providing  other needed resources to bereaved parents.

(GPS Hope is a 501c3 nonprofit and runs on the financial support of those who believe in passing along the hope they have received to others.)

Birthdays:

 

Andreas Claren was born on December 1 and is forever 30.

Jesus Ortega was born on December 2 and is forever 20.

Angie Mata was born on December 4 and is forever 36.

If you would like your child mentioned on the podcast the week of his or her birthday, click here to fill out the short form with the needed information.

The special song written for our children’s birthdays I Remember Well can be heard here.

Remember to Hold On Pain Eases; there is HOPE!

www.gpshope.org

 

To have Laura come and minister at your event, contact us at office@gpshope.org.

Grieving Parents Sharing Hope (GPS Hope) is here to walk with parents through the darkness of child-loss, guiding them to a place of hope, light and purpose.

It is a safe place for anyone who has lost a child from this earth. There is no shame or judgment in where you are in this journey, including if you are struggling in your relationship with God or your faith has been completely shattered.

 

November 24, 2020 by Laura Diehl Leave a Comment

84: Looking Toward My Future After Child Loss

This is the final episode in a 3-part series called Rebuilding Your Life After Child Loss.

First, we hear from two bereaved parents (Sara Nelson and Melanie Delorme) about their journey coming out of the darkness and back to a place of living a life of meaning and purpose again.

Then I share how I have seen and experienced how God lovingly wants to help each of us to move in that same direction.

 

Links Mentioned in this episode:

Click the link below to go to:

Rebuilding Your Life After  Child Loss courses

  • Course One – How Do I Even Start to Rebuild My Life?
  • Course Two – Working Through the Darkness
  • Course Three – Looking Toward My Future

GPS Hope website: gpshope.org

 

Please remember to give this podcast a rating and review to help other parents who are looking for something that will encourage them.

Click here to become a monthly partner, giving hope to other parents, or to give a special gift to keep this podcast going, along with providing  other needed resources to bereaved parents.

(GPS Hope is a 501c3 nonprofit and runs on the financial support of those who believe in passing along the hope they have received to others.)

Birthdays:

Josie Floyd was born on November 24 and is forever 25.

Jessika Matejcik was born on November 25 and is forever 21.

Austin Delgado was born on November 26 and is forever 21.

Tyler Green was born on November 26 and is forever 27.

 

If you would like your child mentioned on the podcast the week of his or her birthday, click here to fill out the short form with the needed information.

The special song written for our children’s birthdays I Remember Well can be heard here.

Remember to Hold On Pain Eases; there is HOPE!

www.gpshope.org

 

To have Laura come and minister at your event, contact us at office@gpshope.org.

Grieving Parents Sharing Hope (GPS Hope) is here to walk with parents through the darkness of child-loss, guiding them to a place of hope, light and purpose.

It is a safe place for anyone who has lost a child from this earth. There is no shame or judgment in where you are in this journey, including if you are struggling in your relationship with God or your faith has been completely shattered.

 

November 17, 2020 by Laura Diehl Leave a Comment

83: Working Through the Darkness of Child Loss

When our child dies, we find ourselves in a place of darkness we didn’t even know existed.

There are often many struggles within that place of darkness. Today we will touch on three of these:

  • Prayer
  • Those around us who don’t understand and aren’t supporting us
  • How our thoughts can keep us in our place of darkness

I want to encourage you that it won’t always be this dark. Those of us who are on this journey ahead of you thought we would never come out, but we did, at some point. Grieving Parents Sharing Hope (GPS Hope) is here, is to walk with you through that darkness, to help guide you back into a place of light, hope and even a life of meaning and purpose again. Our prayer is that we can help you get there quicker than you would be able to get there by yourself.

Links Mentioned in this episode:

Click the link below to go to:

Rebuilding Your Life After  Child Loss courses

  • Course One – How Do I Even Start to Rebuild My Life?
  • Course Two – Working Through the Darkness
  • Course Three – Looking Toward My Future

GPS Hope website: gpshope.org

 

Please remember to give this podcast a rating and review to help other parents who are looking for something that will encourage them.

Click here to become a monthly partner, giving hope to other parents, or to give a special gift to keep this podcast going, along with providing  other needed resources to bereaved parents.

(GPS Hope is a 501c3 nonprofit and runs on the financial support of those who believe in passing along the hope they have received to others.)

Birthdays:

Lara Ann was born on November 17 and is forever 15 ½.

Austin Lotterman was born on November 20 and is forever 8 ½.

Jacinda Avina was born on November 22 and is forever 18.

Jacob LeTourneau was born on November 22 and is forever 21.

Melissa Sulikowski Hill was born on November 23 and is forever 38.

Skylar Spencer was born on November 23 and is forever 24.

 

If you would like your child mentioned on the podcast the week of his or her birthday, click here to fill out the short form with the needed information.

The special song written for our children’s birthdays I Remember Well can be heard here.

Remember to Hold On Pain Eases; there is HOPE!

www.gpshope.org

 

To have Laura come and minister at your event, contact us at office@gpshope.org.

Grieving Parents Sharing Hope (GPS Hope) is here to walk with parents through the darkness of child-loss, guiding them to a place of hope, light and purpose.

It is a safe place for anyone who has lost a child from this earth. There is no shame or judgment in where you are in this journey, including if you are struggling in your relationship with God or your faith has been completely shattered.

 

November 10, 2020 by Laura Diehl Leave a Comment

82: Our Mental Breakdown After Child Loss

In this podcast episode, I talk about the mental breakdown that we struggle with after the death of our child.

If you are like me, the mental break downs are so very frustrating; the confusion, the fogginess, not being able to concentrate, and major forgetfulness (as in forgetting how to do a simple task you have done most of your life)!

It really scared me as I started wondering if I was having an onset of early Alzheimer’s. It took me quite a while to find out that was a normal part of intense grief.

What was happening with me physically and mentally during the worst of my grieving period those first couple of years seemed so much greater than my strength to get through it. But I did, and so can you.

This was a session taken from Course One: How Do I Even Start to Rebuild My Life? from the Rebuilding Your Life After the Death of Your Child courses. Next week will be a session from Course Two: Working Through the Darkness.

 

This episode was sponsored by Jeff and Stacie Snider, in loving memory of their son, Brenton Kristoffer Smith, on the anniversary of his sunset date, November 10, 2015. Thank you, Jeff and Stacie for your support of this podcast. You have our hearts and our prayers.

 

Links Mentioned in this episode:

Click the link below to go to:

Rebuilding Your Life After Child Loss courses

  • Course One – How Do I Even Start to Rebuild My Life?
  • Course Two – Working Through the Darkness
  • Course Three – Looking Toward My Future

GPS Hope website: gpshope.org

 

Please remember to give this podcast a rating and review to help other parents who are looking for something that will encourage them.

Click here to become a monthly partner, giving hope to other parents, or to give a special gift to keep this podcast going, along with providing  other needed resources to bereaved parents.

(GPS Hope is a 501c3 nonprofit and runs on the financial support of those who believe in passing along the hope they have received to others.)

Birthdays:

Beau-Dean Gordon was born on November 10 and is forever 23.

David Shelton was born on November 11 and is forever 23.

Austin Augustine was born on November 14 and is forever 16.

Casen Sancraint was born on November 14 and is forever 10.

 

If you would like your child mentioned on the podcast the week of his or her birthday, click here to fill out the short form with the needed information.

The special song written for our children’s birthdays I Remember Well can be heard here.

Remember to Hold On Pain Eases; there is HOPE!

www.gpshope.org

 

To have Laura come and minister at your event, contact us at office@gpshope.org.

Grieving Parents Sharing Hope (GPS Hope) is here to walk with parents through the darkness of child-loss, guiding them to a place of hope, light and purpose.

It is a safe place for anyone who has lost a child from this earth. There is no shame or judgment in where you are in this journey, including if you are struggling in your relationship with God or your faith has been completely shattered.

 

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Recent Posts

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